Panic!

Panic, sheer terrifying panic.  Yesterday I decided I had better install InDesign on my Mac and take my first look at the program.  InDesign, in case you have never heard of it, is a professional publishing software that is used to lay out print and digital documents.  It helps you lay out the book.  I have heard that it is good software and so I went and bought by myself a copy.

So I installed it and opened it.  Seriously, I had no idea what I was looking at and generally I think of myself as fairly able to learn new things.  It was crazy, there were buttons and commands that even when I I hovered over them and read the bubble explanation, I still had no idea.  It may as well been written in Sanskrit or instructions on how to mix rocket fuel.  I literally sat back at my desk, my stomach in knots, fears of failure welling, feeling completely lost.  I did what anyone would do.

I went to the kitchen and made some banana muffins with walnuts.  Turned out delicious by the way and as is so me I promptly ate two still warm from the oven with a cup of tea.  I absolutely love banana muffins!  I never throw out an overripe banana; I always put them in baggies in the freezer and when I have enough I make banana muffins for emergencies like this one.

Once I had myself calmed down some, I went and opened the program again.  And took a breath.  There are tutorials I can watch and a helpline I can call.  Writing and publishing this cookbook is going to stretch me more than I thought.  I know I can learn.  One step at a time.  Even the promotional material for InDesign sounds foreign to me.  But this is a journey for me, and I will have to learn all kinds of things before I am finished.  This program will just be one.  Wish me luck.

It was all ok by the end of the day. I had a great surprise when I finally emerged from my office.  My guy had made me a pan of rich chocolate brownies covered in nuts.  A row or two of brownies and a glass of milk made me feel just right! Dinner with family finished the day and I realized, after all that eating, I better start exercising.  Once I test one more time all the recipes in my cookbook before finishing it, I will be the size of a house.  And since I love eating too much to stop or frankly to diet, I better start exercising!  Okay now I need double the luck!